Don’t forget to shake

After a relaxing and fun bath is the best time to release. You’re clean and refreshed. What better way to prepare yourself for a great nights sleep than to do this ritual which cleanses you of the days germs, dirt, food, schmutz and anything else your body may collect. What’s even better is sprinkling your rug with the liquid waste most people save for the potty. So there I am, trying to dry off Baby J’s little body while he shivers and he gets into ‘position’. I hurry and put the towel down to give him a target. Its easier to clean a towel than the carpet. A quick stream and then he stops. Turns 90 degrees to make sure the target is far away from his aim. He starts again, I throw the towel in place to make sure the carpet didn’t get any. Stop, 90 degree turn and a giggle this time. I am trying so hard not to laugh I can’t ask him if he wants to go pee-pee on the potty even though I know all too well that its too late for that. He finally realized he wasn’t going to be able to water his carpet with mom around. J spots a paper cup that adults typically use to rinse their mouth out after brushing their teeth, but J uses to stack and knock over and they are all over the room. He picks one up. Places it strategically in front of his penis and finishes the job. Hands me the cup and says “Dank You!”

Sex symbol?

I think Kevin Covais is the only American Idol top 12 that doesnt shave. Let me get that straight, even the females shave, somewhere. My question is how can you be a sex symbol if you don't even have to shave?

Head, shoulders, knees and toes..

While I was changing J for bedtime tonight he was sitting in his diaper exploring his body. He would point and I would name what it was.
‘Belly’
‘eye’
‘foot’
He then looked down and found something. He looked at me as he was pointing and he said ‘nee-pool’. And I looked up and said ‘yes, that’s your nipple’. He then looked down and pointed to his other nipple and repeated ‘nee-pool’. Again I reassured him that he was correct. After he was sure that he only had two of them he made sure that he had enough hands with enough fingers. He squeezed each of his ‘nee-pools’ and pranced around the room proclaiming the part of his anatomy he was grasping. We had quite a laugh. I don’t think either one of us stopped laughing for a good ten minutes.

I will tell him this story when he is 17 and will never believe me, but you just cant make this stuff up.

My last post?

Out of nowhere I am told I have to go. I am part of some gang that no matter what my life is about, I have to do what I am told or there are consequences. I drop everything and pack a small bag. My mind is running in a thousand directions and I am trying to figure out how I want to leave things. Do I write a note or do I say what I feel out loud. Do I not say anything and just let life move on without me because I know I will not be back. I will never see my room and my home and all the ones I love again. I have a gut feeling that the sun beating on my golden red hair would be the last that I would ever feel. I am scared. I am petrified. I am weak.

The last thing I do is I go to my son’s bedroom and watch him sleep. How peaceful he looks. He lets out a big sigh. My absolute favorite sound in the world. He has a whole life ahead of him and this is the last day he will know with me in it, I think to myself. Will he remember me? Will he know how much and how deep I feel for him? Will someone tell him all the sacrifices I have and would do for him? I rub his soft and adorable cheek. It’s warm and full of life. I want to run from my fate and take him with me. My heart drops as deep as it possibly could be.

I run to the front lawn and scream out loud to the ones waiting for me.
“I don’t want to go!”
“I WILL NOT GO!”
“You just don’t understand!”
“I cant, I love him too much!”
“You just can’t understand!”
“Your not a mother!”

Someone comes out of the house with a large serving platter of pink and white cookies and says “We know, that’s why you are not going.”

Then I wake up.